Ryan is small for his age – he’s at the very bottom of the boys’ normal growth curve. Being an allergic child may have a small part in that, but his genes probably play a greater role in his stature. You see, I’m only 4’ 10” tall – and almost every branch on our family tree is littered with small people. I never really thought it was a big deal – to be honest I sometimes forget that I’m short. That is until an average-sized ten-year-old stands beside me.
So, what bothers me about being short? It’s a royal pain having to get a stool to reach the second and third shelves in our kitchen cabinets…and trying to reach the upper shelves at the grocery store is impossible. If there’s nobody looking I take a page out of Amy Roloff’s book and climb up the shelves to reach what I need. (Amy is the mom on TLC’s Little People Big World – I love that show. That is until Rogers took away my free channels…damn you, Rogers!) I guess what I’m trying to say is that I’ve adapted to being short. It’s not such a big deal for me anymore. Apparently, it’s a bigger deal for short men.
Last week I watched Howard Goldberg’s documentary: “S&M: Short and Male”. It was a fantastic, humorous look into how short men fare in our society – and it totally freaked me out! According to the experts featured in this doc, Ryan will have his work cut out for him. They claim that women are hard-wired to choose tall mates. He better stay cute, otherwise he’s going to have a hard time getting dates. He’s also going to have to work harder to earn a living…because a man’s annual income increases $1,000 per inch of height. Heck, even 99% of sperm banks in the US have a height requirement of 5’11”.
What made me really upset is that instead of being supportive of short boys, some parents are giving them potentially dangerous hormone injections and even going so far as having their legs broken and putting them in traction for 3 months so they can gain two inches of height. Is it really that important? Come on…
So, as Murphy’s Law would have it, my two daughters are going to be of average height like their dad…and Ryan will most likely be short like me. I don’t know who Murphy is…but I’d like to give him a swift kick!
So, what bothers me about being short? It’s a royal pain having to get a stool to reach the second and third shelves in our kitchen cabinets…and trying to reach the upper shelves at the grocery store is impossible. If there’s nobody looking I take a page out of Amy Roloff’s book and climb up the shelves to reach what I need. (Amy is the mom on TLC’s Little People Big World – I love that show. That is until Rogers took away my free channels…damn you, Rogers!) I guess what I’m trying to say is that I’ve adapted to being short. It’s not such a big deal for me anymore. Apparently, it’s a bigger deal for short men.
Last week I watched Howard Goldberg’s documentary: “S&M: Short and Male”. It was a fantastic, humorous look into how short men fare in our society – and it totally freaked me out! According to the experts featured in this doc, Ryan will have his work cut out for him. They claim that women are hard-wired to choose tall mates. He better stay cute, otherwise he’s going to have a hard time getting dates. He’s also going to have to work harder to earn a living…because a man’s annual income increases $1,000 per inch of height. Heck, even 99% of sperm banks in the US have a height requirement of 5’11”.
What made me really upset is that instead of being supportive of short boys, some parents are giving them potentially dangerous hormone injections and even going so far as having their legs broken and putting them in traction for 3 months so they can gain two inches of height. Is it really that important? Come on…
So, as Murphy’s Law would have it, my two daughters are going to be of average height like their dad…and Ryan will most likely be short like me. I don’t know who Murphy is…but I’d like to give him a swift kick!
I don't know if Ryan's stature bothers him...It doesn't seem so. He is,however, one of the most endearing children I have ever met!!
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